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It's been 13 chapters since I last reviewed. The story is great as always. Your story and world building is pretty much improving per chapter. The changing perspective gives the story a little more life in my opinion. Though I usually prefer Third Person Omniscient narratives, good writing bypasses that. The cliffhanger is a pretty nice touch to end the chapter there. Overall this story is starting to develop its full potential and you, good author, are becoming better and better. And I have the great privilege to witness this story's growth from the start and hopefully until its end. So thank you. And I do hope you continue enjoying writing as much as we, your readers, enjoy reading your work. Until next chapters to come.

This was the review of a person that I´d not heard of for ages. The day I saw him actually review again made me tear up slightly, as I had thought that he had long since stopped caring about my story. But after seeing this, I felt so much more motivated to carry on, and felt far more confident in what I did. I am still waiting for his next review, as I did stop writing on that particular crossover for now. One day, though, I know that I´ll see his name again, and I´m looking forward to it.

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This review still makes me grin to this very day. Um... This seems more like M rated gore to me. *is extremely shaken up* I also don't think that amount of detail is needed... I'm actually terrified t

I'm grinning like a adman right now  Best review so far for my latest chapter. __________ You have finally graced us with another chapter. Even though the chapters come slowly I'm grateful t

This is one of my favourite reviews left for 'Ravaged World' A real classic, and sums up my work in a nutshell. Yay! Elite Four time! That was what I thought coming into this chapter. Instead, I get t

Got a very good review from someone on a story recently, and they analyzed it in depth to point out all the positives with it.

 

Also wrote a story based on I’ll Be Home for Christmas, and got a review from someone who actually was part of a military family and loved it that I used the theme because it was relatable… That really meant a lot…

 

Got a quite a few reviewers who like my style and say it's almost like poetry… Kind of interesting because I'd never thought of it that way, and the I'm actually not that good at writing poetry…

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This review I just got for The Time Displaced Sith just blew me away....

After reading this new chapter I have to say that I am thoroughly impressed with the work you have delivered as of late. The new addition to the the story so far is nothing short of impressive work as It clears up some lesser plot points that still had to be cleared up. After thinking about the new chapter (probably more than I have should) I have come to the conclusion that I would enjoy to see more about Nathrrya's past I think this could (if you were taking suggestions) be a key reason why people change they view about her for good and most importantly "hint" bad. As people find more about her murky past they could react in rash ways, For example say one of the Jedi knights finds out this could lead to some confrontations which is a good way of introducing and letting the reader know the full force of her power and capabilities as a force user. As this is only a suggestion I don't expect you to do anything along what I have said but I do believe we need to see her in actio  n or maybe (this sounds real dark but) break, those light techniques so suppress her anger shouldn't work 100% of the time. The story is turning into something great may the quality ever last. An important thing to keep in mind though is that people have gravitated towards the story because of the politics and Nathrrya's realization of Darth Sidious' secret plans for the galaxy. (Write them as fast as possible please)

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I woke up to this one the other day. It was a good start after my dog woke me up so early.

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Oh my.... goodness. This is???? So good?? It made my dad it’s loving and warm and beautiful and gosh bless u for writing it. I’m not the best with words but please know that my heart is squealing with happiness. This is so well written and emotional and in character and boy. Wow. Ok. This is amazing pls keep writing you made my day.

1

 

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I've had some really nice comments fir my last chapter of TDS and here are some of them.

You, you... argh! You just, had to end it right there didn’t you! God damn it! 

Seriously though, I love this fanfic, and I love Nat. Definitely agree with a lot of her views regarding the Jedi, who seriously any the hell out of me. I mean seriously cutting out passion! It’s the stuff your passionate about which makes life worth living. For kriffing sake.


Can’t wait for the next chapter. Just do me a favour and do less mini cliffhangers. Don’t think my heart can take it.

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I really enjoy it when I see a chapter update for this story. Really loved how you used Obi Wan's lines from A New Hope for Nathrrya. Totally classic. Really enjoyed how she tore into Qui Gon about abandoning Obi Wan and also pointing out to the Council that letting Anakin go without training could expose him to the Sith Lord Sideous. Yeah that is totally smart of the Council. Not! Looking forward to the next update.

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Oh, and there's the kath hound being set amongst the banthas. Next chapter is gonna be fun.

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So, the revelation, at last! And I liked how she put Qui-Gon straight. I wonder if she will be able to train Anakin, and how the Jedi council will react to her being a Sith.
Anyway, thanks for the great chapter, and good luck for the next one ! 

 

 

 

 

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I just got this one yesterday and it filled me with so much happiness and thought. I still need to reply to it too but urgh what to say...

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This is probably my favorite PMMM fic, honestly. I first read it a few years ago, and it's stuck with me ever since. Because it's so amazing, and this world you've created is insanely fascinating, as are your versions of the characters. I love their interactions, and the way you wrote them. And God, the worldbuilding! I am hooked. I adore what you gave us and am so curious about everything else about this AU. You dropped hints, but they leave me dying to know more--what are the Incubators? What happened to Madoka and Sayaka? What is the Operation, exactly? Like, I would absolutely read a full novel taking place in this world, I really would. What you've made here is so intricate and creative and interesting and brilliant, and it makes me internally gush every time I read it. I just really, really love this.

 

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 Not really a comment, but along the line. I have a story that's a chapter story.  It's not written as well as my other works due to a certain formatting,  and that also gives it an erratic update schedule.  However, it said story has over 1000 hits and climbing. It's nice to know that even if people look at a story briefly,  or look at it and decide they don't like it, at least they found it worth  A try.  Not to mention that in the thousand or so people that looked at the story, there are probably those that care about the work and want to see it finished.  So it warms my heart to know that there are so many people are willing to look, even if they never leave any feedback.

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Wasn't sure which direction to go with a character, so I start looking at some old reviews. The general consensus was that people enjoyed the character is being bratty and antagonistic, because not a lot of characters were written like that. So I'm exactly where to go.

 

A more recent review stated that they really enjoyed how I characterized the somewhat controversial Pokémon character Sabrina, and that she was one of their favorite characters. I was really touched by this because the way I chose to characterize Sabrina was a bit different than how she's usually characterized, and I wasn't sure how people would react.

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I'm grinning like a adman right now :D Best review so far for my latest chapter.

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You have finally graced us with another chapter. Even though the chapters come slowly I'm grateful they come at all. I can't really add much on what I said last time (that's if you remember me at all) but the story is more than defiantly on the build up. From what I can see the story can only get better and I'm probably going to enjoy most of it. Not that I've wrote much before but I think it was a bit too early to reveal who she really was to the emperor but I don't mind it's your story. Believe it or not what I just said is the few bad things I can say about the chapter other than that it's all going good so far. 
In other news I did send you a reply to the reply you sent to me about the review of the previous chapter I have no Idea if you got that but you may have to search through your junk to find it. If you can't find it don't worry because I'll just copy and paste it right here.-

"To be honest with you when I said politics I was in fact referring to the Nat and Padme scene it is just that I had no idea what to call it. The fact that you replied in such a timely manner is frankly astounding I was taken aback that you replied at all (to be honest with you I was trying trying to help you out and hopefully have some sort of second opinion on the story as a whole not just in the chapter I mentioned). It sounds that you have put a lot of time and effort into the story which is great and I always enjoy to see. 

This was just a little response to say thanks for the reply and if you need to swing anything by me like minor plot points I am always willing to give an opinion on them it may not be what you finally decide on but having someone to to give an opinion is just what might give the you (the writer) the stimuli needed to make a decision."

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This wasn’t a fully positive review, but it was crazy, stupid constructive and helped me figure out what was wrong with the first chapter of one of my stories. This is the perfect constructive criticism, IMO. 

“Your prose is nice to read, and I found myself rather deeply immersed in the scene, so I wouldn't say it's your writing turning people away. What wasn't working for me was the lack of information given about the voice Parthy hears, and why he grows so comfortable so quickly with it. It's clearly a key plot point, but I can't tell if the voice's identity is supposed to be a mystery or not. I realize that the story is supposed to be a slow-burn, but it feels like the plot is being held out of my reach, rather than being fed to me in pieces that are just the right size to keep me wanting more. So I think the biggest improvement you could make to this is to offer the readers a bigger piece of the plot up front to keep them turning the page.”

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Got this one that was both uplifting and interesting:

So, there are several things that interest me about this story, and some of that may be because I recently started a sociology class. But, anyway, to begin with, I like the formatting of this story. While it reads like a narrative, it has a structure and flow of a poem. Really well crafted to be able to do something like this. What mainly interests me about this story is that it begins in a sort of state of safety: the unspoken truce between creatures in this ultra world. It's not a safety in the sense a person in civilization would understand, but it's more of a primal sense of safety. That safety is broken to put Nihilego into another sense of safety: that of comfort, contentment, and freedom offered by our world or the Pokeworld. So, in this way, you've used your word in several different contexts within the same story, and that speaks well for how you've handled the challenge.

Let's move on to the sociological aspect. Nihilego is experiencing culture shock as it is introduced into a new world. It has to relearn gestures, expressions, and meaning out of symbols to assimilate in its new environment. Culture shock, if it runs its course properly, usually is brief and eventually the newcomer gains new insight and friendships associated with the new culture, which we see here. So, in essence, your story is a myth, or metaphor, for that experience.

Finally, just one last note on something you mentioned in your author's notes. While I admit that it was better that you went with a more benevolent version of Nihilego (I've only just started playing Sun), its name and its given personality interest me. Obviously, it's a reference to Nihilism. Clever, Pokemon Company, clever.

Anyway, this was a fun read, and good luck on the challenge!

Best,
Zad

What makes this even more interesting is that I recently found the person is part of a group called Critics United, which looks for stories that violate rules or are otherwise very bad and is very harsh with them.

 

So to get such an excellent review for one of their members was quite an honor and surprising…

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Submitted the latest set of chapters for Diary, and within 2 min., someone added the submission to a folder entitled “YOU ARE AWESOME!”. I quickly realized this was the same person who had added Daughter to the same folder when I looked at the name. Also realized that Daughter’s folder had been changed to “YOU ARE VERY AWESOME!” Someone must really like my work. :)

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Recently got this shout-out from a fellow author on FFN...

 

"Special thanks to Belmakori, who is not only very encouraging with feedback, but also an excellent writer.  Seriously, go and read Bel's stuff, it's awesome!"

 

And to think, I was telling him that I was really liking his story....  :)

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Someone called one of my stories a “one-handed skill book,” referring to books you can read in Skyrim that give you skill points. But he wasn’t referring to weapons, here. Think of the things men do one-handed, and you’ll know what he was talking about. Funny thing, though, the story was my Christmas story, the one I wrote for TAZ challenge. There wasn’t any sex in it. It was flirty and passionate and intimate, but it faded to black long before any sex was had. 

I’m honestly very glad he liked my story, but I don’t want to know how he spends his spare time. 

And yes, I put it in the “uplifting comments” thread as a little innuendo of my own. ;)

 

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35 minutes ago, MyBlueSkye said:

Someone called one of my stories a “one-handed skill book,” referring to books you can read in Skyrim that give you skill points. But he wasn’t referring to weapons, here. Think of the things men do one-handed, and you’ll know what he was talking about. Funny thing, though, the story was my Christmas story, the one I wrote for TAZ challenge. There wasn’t any sex in it. It was flirty and passionate and intimate, but it faded to black long before any sex was had. 

I’m honestly very glad he liked my story, but I don’t want to know how he spends his spare time. 

And yes, I put it in the “uplifting comments” thread as a little innuendo of my own. ;)

 

Oh good lord :D What a bizarre thing to say! And I agree it's already bordering on TMI (Too Much Information) as it is ;)

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