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darkened-storm

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darkened-storm last won the day on January 31

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About darkened-storm

  • Birthday November 1

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  1. Rather than repost links I’ve edited my origins post to flag changes, thought it might be easier for you to track that way. I also think it might be good to flag pieces that were submitted the month prior that didn’t get reviews so that people go for them first
  2. Looks good. I shall have a peruse when I am feeling less blocked
  3. I have to be in the mood to listen to LP. Like, I love the band, but it’s not what I’d go to listen to when I’m trying to be productive. that being said - fantastic stuff. I used to see a lot of AMV’s, and an amazing one about the Blitzkreig boys on YouTube set to Numb … sigh, those were the days. I think I got back into them around the era of Transformers because they featured heavily in the first three movies and we’re my favourite parts of those soundtracks. So yeah, I like it all!
  4. This - people forget that Tyson has a lot going on, so it's easy to say: he's being really immature but to be honest, Max and Ray leaving probably just worsened his abandonment issues because they basically became like his family through the original series and V-Force. Poor Tyson
  5. When you write fanfiction, do you think your write it based on the source material, or is it fanfiction based on what you see in the fandom? I think this is a big issue, particularly with some of the less developed characters, where there's more about them in fanon, things become mistaken for canon when they are not, but I think personally have more of a problem with bastardisation of character personalities, i.e Kai: Beyblade, Yamato: Digimon etc... On the contrary, in fandoms where there are fewer additional characters, I've actually seen some OCs been cycled around the fandom such as Elektrcum's OC's in the Narnia fandom Discuss =)
  6. Yeah I took down an Alpha Parasect in the third area but he was a toughie Also, how the hell are you getting Eevee to spawn. I've only had 3 spawn. You need to jump in the grass and chuck a berry away from you so they run to it. Evolution stores are in some store in the main village - google it cuz I can't remember exactly where - I have umbreon already and I've been playing 2 days, rank 3 That DLC idea sounds brilliant, with pokemon snap they did updates that added maps so that'd be cool
  7. This. Hiro is one of my favourite characters - always has been. He is incredibly complex, but also there is so much potential when writing about him. @AquilaTempestasYou're right, the series doesn't give us an explanation, nor does it give us a reconciliation between the brothers, but that is why I absolutely love fanfiction - because I can write that resolution. And I will... eventually
  8. I'm going to start it tomorrow on my lunch break. I'm picking Cyndaquil =)
  9. I have nothing spectacular, but this little tidbit where Kai, even though he knows he needs to give Becky space to process the fact that he won't be returning as their captain this year, he still worries about her feelings, so he goes to her cousin instead. ---- “How is she?” Steph didn’t need to guess the she he was referring to. “Angry. At least I’m guessing because she refuses to talk about you. I wouldn’t be surprised if she recruits Tyson and Daichi into an anti-Kai club. They’ll probably meet on Tuesdays and Thursdays and talk about how much of a disappointment you are.”
  10. What I've reviewed so far (good thing I got a head start due to this weekends circumstances) - Smells Like Teen Spirit - Time After Time - Rich Husband, Poor Wife - Shattered Memories - Get Inside - College Professors
  11. I love how you refer to it as a battlefield =) This is pretty bloody adorable, I'm not going to lie =) The banter and the back and forth - pure fluff, while still keeping with the action. A few suggestions to make it flow a bit nicer... Perhaps for the first sentence, breaking it up a bit: His hands found the small mallet as Ace dropped a coin into the slot. He felt the a rush of cold air beneath his fingers and heard the clatter of a puck being dropped. Slamming is coming off a bit harsh, I feel like I'm watching football not air hockey: try: Ace dropped the puck onto the table and gave it a nudge with his mallet, propelling to towards Niko. (The emphasis is coming from the word propel here instead) Again - whacking comes across as not the right term, try knocking the flat disc away from his goal. Conversely, slapping is fine - in feal hockey they use the term slap shot, so this keeps me in the scene. The disc spiralled from side to side - ricocheted is better used here. the puck is flat, not a ball. although that means using ricocheted twice, you can try substituting bounce instead in either spot. Also, these two look so cute together, I already love them Good job!
  12. I can always count on you to chop my words =) Point taken =)
  13. I have submitted a WIP for review in my person thread, but something I also worked on today was a little CANDY scene to cheer myself up =) A cute little Steph x Matt scene from an upcoming chapter of Tri: Of Honesty and Loyalty ---- Just as she was thinking about how she could spend forever like this; she heard a rustling behind them, followed by the sound of voices. Quiet voices - and some not so quiet ones - whispering excitedly from the next room, and remembered that they were supposed to be supervising their Digimon. Slowly she pulled away from him, ignoring his muffled sounds of protest, and inclined her head towards the rehearsal room where she caught a glimpse of blue and white fur as it darted back out of the room, followed by a flash of orange. “I think,” she said, her voice catching, “that we might have an audience.” He laughed soundlessly. “I noticed,” he said. Then, in a far sterner voice that their audience could clearly hear, he added; “the lot of you better make yourselves scarce if you know what’s good for you.” The Digimon squealed in alarm as they scrambled away, tripping over their own feet as they hurried to shut the door behind them. “Knuckleheads,” he muttered, and she couldn’t help but laugh; a laugh that he quickly silenced with another kiss, this time soft and lingering. Forgetting the momentary interruption, she kissed him back, noting the way that his heartbeat began to race and he reached for her again … And then her phone chimed.
  14. Oh they always need a bit of polishing but this is great to begin with
  15. I think you need to change this up, using looked and looking doesn't roll off the tongue nicely. The rest is fantastic! Poor Lyra!!!
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