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AquilaTempestas

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Blog Comments posted by AquilaTempestas

  1. On 1/16/2020 at 7:15 AM, RykerDavis said:

    I read your post … and I am not sure if I am supposed to comment or not but here is my take.  My heart goes out to you because I remember the same battle at your age.

    Life isn't measured by what you haven't accomplished or have accomplished. It is about the journey you took to get there.   Any one still in school and fighting to continue isn't a loser or a Bum. Now if you lazyed around all day... did nothing to help around the house, never went to school, and felt it was your right as your parents child.... then maybe a bum.   27  is nothing.  You are only in the first quarter of your life.  Trust me I am in my 40's and still have a list 10 miles long that I haven't  accomplished....yet

    Those three little lets make up the worlds largest possibility.  Until the day you die you still have time.  And here is the secret... that time table you are trying to keep yourself too... is just an arbitrary number, that has no real number.  If there is no work in the area... how is it your fault that you don't have a job.  If you don't have the means to accomplish something... then you need to change the scope of the task.    And most of all cut yourself a little slack because no one thinks as little of you... as you do. Most people are way more awesome than they think they are.  

    As for ending your writing... please don't .  Whether you publish or not continue writing.  You have stories to tell, I promise.  As for your target audience. Yeah we love feed back but we really don't write for anyone but us., anyways.  Take it from some who started … stopped with a vengeance 20 times in the last 30 years.  As long as you ask what if … you will never be out of stories. 

    I know you think its easy for me to be all Raw-Raw and I don't understand... but  even from the other side of the world I can tell that you there is hope for you.  Top reason: it bothers you that there might not be hope for you.  Apathy is the true person killer.

    I am sorry if I stepped out of line but I though you needed that hand on the shoulder moment.

    Ryker  (Fathom)

    Just read this now! Thanks very much for your kind words. It really does mean  a lot that you took time out of your day/night to read this. Your words actually brought a smile to my face, and they're very encouraging! So thank you again! 

  2. I have never been bullied (not at school at least, but cyber bullying yes but who hasn't?) Some people did try, but my bizarre ability to turn everything into a joke on them made them stop. I was too weird because I didn't react in anger or sadness, but with comedy. Humour has been my saving grace. 

    Bullies are just sad people who get off on making other people feel like shit too. So they try to pick on people who look easy - people they can dominate - because they are people with miserable pathetic lives that don't know anything better. 

    Sometimes these bullies are products of abuse and they need help because their parents don't give a shit. Sometimes they are just naturally nasty people and deserve miserable lives. 

  3. I do bear some slight grudges against people who did bring my family hurt.

    Like my mum's sister's family for example. They lied to us. Manipulated us. Tried to get us to pay their debts. This went on for over a decade. The husband was a madman. He did nothing worthy in his life and only brought pain and suffering to everyone who got too close. A person who left their first two children to die (literally ignored them and moved overseas) in my eyes doesn't ever deserve to be forgiven.

    They left for 7 years and didn't say anything. When they came back we only found out through someone else by chance. I don't think about it everyday - only when the topic is brought up over dinner. I think grudges are fine as long as they don't impact your own well being to a point you can't function. I think these grudges are reminders of pain and we can use that to our advantage.

  4. I don't fear speaking in front of people - I fear the words that come out of my mouth might sound stupid. That's what I'm scared of.

    I think a lot of public speaking fear comes from schools. Kids can be rude and such impressions can leave a bad taste in your mouth. There's also the added pressure of getting graded on your volume, fluency, tone etc and that can add to the nerves.

    I've found it is best to try and look at your friends in the audience or the teacher and just ignore everyone else.

     

  5. 12 hours ago, onewiththewheels said:

    That sucks, and I wish you the best of luck... :(

    Actually, someone sent me something recently when I was feeling down about my life.

    It really cheered me up, because even though my situation is not the same as yours, there is some similarities (older, can't find a job, have friends that have jobs and houses with less degrees and I'm currently living at home, went through a teaching program only to not use it, had said degree not work out, trying to get entry-level with no experience).

     

    I'll just leave it here for you, in case it cheers you up too.

     

     

      Reveal hidden contents

     

     

    I hope that helps, and once again, good luck.

    It's actually funny that you bring that up. Once I finished writing this post, I found the exact same thing moments later.

    But thanks for the kind words : ) It does mean a lot. Life is shit at the moment (but it could be much worse), but I think it only makes us stronger people in the long run and eventually it'll pay off.

  6. On 4/20/2018 at 2:32 PM, Nirianne said:

    Meh. Being single isn't that bad. I mean, you have more independence and you are your own master. Your choices can lead to your success or downfalls. Honestly, having a significant other isn't an achievement at all. Sure, it might give you a bit of solace knowing you can always depend on them, but what's the rush? Do you need more burdens in your life? When they die, you're left alone. That's a burden to bare. What if they turned into a psychopath? What if they're sweet to you only to become trash bags later? So what if others say you should find someone? I mean, they won't help you in your time of need. I say it's trash. My relatives do this as well, but I'm like, sorry career and my selfishness come first. (I'm aiming to be a millionaire, you see, lol)

    And falling in love is poison too; I fell in love with someone I thought was the one and they turned into a religious zealot over the course of 3 weeks. Not gonna go through that again.

    Besides, you're a solid, independent woman who has choices. What more could you possibly want? Everyone else can buzz off.

    Sadly, I feel it's one of those things where you status gets judged in the workplace. I know I got judged a lot at my former one and I know it happens a lot to me when I attend family things and everyone else is hitched with someone and I'm just standing there looking like a dork.

    On 4/23/2018 at 2:10 PM, MyBlueSkye said:

    Everyone wants to buck up their own lives, that’s all it is. I hear the “family is the only thing that matters,” and “the only thing that matters is having people you love and who love you back,” and I like being married. I love my child even though I do not like being a mother, if that makes any sense.  And I wish people wouldn’t say things like that. It’s nice having a family of my own, but fuck, it’s not the only thing that matters. Our culture is one of overstatement and exaggeration these days. Everything is “awesome” or “the worst.” And people “literally can’t even.” No, most everything people say is awesome or the worst is nothing of the kind. And all the exaggeration is just really getting old. 

    I’m feeling a lot of guilt right now because people on FB are passing around an article about a study which “proves” children born to mothers who work are better off, that they grow up having a better work ethic and are more successful. I”m a SAHM, but I used to work, and most of the people on my FB are successful professionals. So that’s what they’re using to reinforce their own choices. I know this, yet still feel awful about it. Just like the “love is the only thing that matters” crowd are doing the same thing on the other side. 

    Of course all this is a lot easier ssaid than accepted, right?!

    Also, in my experience, I dated a shitload all throughout school and young adulthood, and didn’t end up meeting my husband until 34. My sister didn’t date until she was in her mid-twenties and met hers at the same age. So, dating doesn’t mean that much, maybe? 

    Agreed. I think the problem is everyone else wants to be part of your business too and they think they can dictate how your life should be based on their experiences.

    I don't know about that study. Sounds like a lot of shit. My mother doesn't work either, and I'm in a much better position than those who do. I think those studies are written by mothers who do work looking to prove that stay at home mothers are lazy (which is very untrue and whoever came up with that statement is stupid. It all comes down to the mother - not whether she is a worker or not)

     

  7. Oh yeah, some people just get way too clingy to their 'fandom' and expect everything to run the way they think it should be.

    I remember I changed a few things for a story in the Supernatural fandom and people went off. "You can't do that" "That's not canon" But hello... The showrunners forget their own canon too....

    I also had this Beyblade story that was set for a ancient Egypt world and I offended this person so much because of my genre. Pretty funny. I told them it was an AU... They didn't care... But it was fine for them to turn male characters into female because that's totally canon...

  8. I know what you mean. I have this cousin of mine who thinks she is always right no matter what and dismisses all advice as incorrect.

    I think it does depend on whether or not you are actually looking for advice or just feedback. I think they are different and I see advice is when someone specifically asks for tips on improvements whilst feedback is just pointing out what you liked and disliked (but that's not necessarily giving advice). When it comes to fanfiction writing and such, I do consider it insulting when someone says I don't know what I am doing and so and so could be done better because that is what they prefer - I don't consider that advice. To me, advice would be saying, 'I can see what you are trying to do here, but have you considered trying this out?'

    Giving advice can seem like you are shoving your ideas down someone else's throat - I think you have to see it from their point of view first before giving your answers. I have given advice to people before only for them to get offended - like my cousin and I had a debate over creative writing and she's an english teacher. She completely ignored my advice because I'm not a teacher (yet). 

    Anyways. What I am trying to say is before you even give advice, ask yourself - is the person really asking for advice or do they just want some feedback? Let's use Smite for example. I see a Neith player building badly. If I pointed out to them they were doing it all wrong, they're most likely going to get offended - they didn't ask for help so why the hell should they listen to me? If however they asked for some help, and I gave them my suggestions, that would be advice. Now if they got angry after asking for advice, then that's their problem. Basically, most people don't want advice unless they specifically ask for it to save face. No one likes being told they are wrong. No one likes feeling dumb. People don't want to be insulted and I think a lot of people fail to see the other person's pov and thus feelings get hurt.

  9. 20 hours ago, TJMike said:

    Alright, I'll join the lonely club. In my opinion, we're just too good for most people. Society is stupid and when someone as bright as us nerds appears, they are either too scared to come close to us or too lazy to try and comprehend us.

    I do believe though, we'll find a person who gets us eventually. It's just a matter of keep looking. ^_^

    Yay!

    I hear that all the time. I honestly don't think there is a person for everyone otherwise every single person would have someone. I do think that some people do have that desire to be with someone else in a romantic sense and other people simply don't care. One of my dad's friends never dated and never had an interest in spending time with a significant other. He doesn't care as he's busy travelling the world and indulging in his hobbies. I think we get the wrong idea - that being in a relationship WILL make you happy. Only you can define what will make you happy and I don't think it's fair to judge anyone for their romantic life or lack of one.

    My views change from time to time. I think when I see 'happy' people together I kinda feel left out. But I don't hate single life. Strange spot to be in. But I honestly think that I can live alone for the rest of my life and I wouldn't feel depressed about it. As long as I have enough income to survive and do what I want I'll be right. The only times I do feel left out is when it's shoved in my face. I'm naturally an introverted person and being around people is exhausting to me lol. I've met random guys off the internet that were somewhat similar to me in terms of personality and hobbies and such, but my god, I just wanted out.

    Maybe I'm just too selfish.

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