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My two cents on the Past



This may sound odd, since a lot of you see me as a negative person, but I am a very positive person outside of the internet. I do have hopes and dreams like many of you...it's just that due to my past experiences, I've come to assume the worst, not because I want to, but because I'm too scared to be close to someone that could potentially ruin my life. My past is why I am untrusting to everyone that tries to help me, why I push people away, and why I choose to be isolative from everyone...and I hate that.   I hate that the past has such a psychological grip on not just me, but on people as well, making them feel angry, expect the worst from anything, and lash out at everything that moves, even though they aren't directly at fault. I hate that the past forces most of us to live in fear of reliving it over and over again, and to keep us for striving for a better life, and I hate that people keep telling us to get over it as if it's possible to move on with a snap of a finger, that's like telling someone with PTSD to get over seeing death and destruction now that the war was long since past, it is ingrained into our minds, and we will never move on from it as quickly as you want us too, it does not work like that.


The past itself is not really what people look back on, it's those bad memories of them that stick with us, as we remember negative memories in more detail and far more often than positive ones, of course some researchers say that emotion is another contributing factor for those memories, since they're directly the cause of someone's negative emotional reactions...sounds similar to PTSD, without it being PTSD.  Of course, there are also some good memories that people like to look back on, but how often do people talk about those? We are prone to remember our past in a far negative standpoint than we do positive, for example, you could remember going to an amusement park and having a blast, but then you remember how upset you were that someone got your food order wrong, or how someone punched you for cutting in line when you didn't, or when someone accidentally puked on you after they rode one of the rides with a full belly.  It's not really a bad thing, but it does become worse when it starts to become a crippling fear of amusement parks, all because you didn't want history to repeat itself.  Anybody with the patience and time can try to help people cope with it, and help them make newer, better memories, in the hopes that it could overwrite the past entirely...at least, that what I hope. It is possible to make new memories, newer, better memories, if we're willing to try, and some of us are stubborn sons of bitches, we don't want to forget...but like I said, time and patience.


Sorry if it's just me ranting and raving again, but I had to get my two cents out. The past is hard to forget, and even if we want to let it go, it finds a way to come back. But you can come back to me with your two cents on this subject, hopefully I didn't trigger too many people in the process.


VectorLogic, out!!!


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